Alright, alright, alright. It's Valentine's Week, folks! You know what that means... boyfriends, husbands, fiances, you know what to do. Start ordering those flowers! And pick a card! Maybe some nice chocolate! Single boys and girls: go get that discounted chocolate! Yeah, I said it and you know what I mean.
It's that time of the year that everything is painted in pink, purple and red and hearts are thrown everywhere like confetti. Remember ladies: do not throw YOUR hearts out. We don't want another "Last Christmas" Mariah Carey moment where she reminds everyone she will do much better next year. THE TIME IS NOW.
Now, attention everyone. BE LESS BASIC and more original when ordering those flowers. You hear me? As someone who has now spent YEARS with flowers, I beg a few questions. What is with all the fancy jazz with roses? My dudes, it is one of the very few flowers that has thorns. I swear to you that there are PLENTY of other flowers JUST as pretty as the rose AND WAY less painful. Every rose has it's thorns and every florist has it's complaints. Stop the madness. Gosh. And stop putting those precious, gorgeous businessmen and women through potentially making themselves BLEED just because you want your daggum roses. It's not worth it. Save the pain! Is it really that romantic? No!
Let me remind you that there are very beautiful dahlias! There's sunflowers! There's hydrangeas! There's all kinds of cool stuff. There's daisies! There's birds of paradise! There's zinnias! There's orchids! There's lilies! There's gardenias! There's peonies! Get crazy, people! Knock yourselves out! Educate yourselves! Live a little!
However, I will say this. A little birdie told me this: the reason that some might say roses are preferred is because they last longer and are hardier than others. But that's besides the point! I said what I said. Have a beautiful valentine's week with those you love the most, whether you are single or not. Tell your momma you love her.
Oh no! Blasphemy against the Empress of the Garden!
ReplyDeleteI jest-- but we all must admit that the rose's cultural associations-- which date back to Classical Antiquity and almost certainly earlier, in both the East and West-- are much richer than those of, say, zinnias or gardenias. In fact I halfway suspect that humans are evolutionarily programmed to like roses.
One of my favorite varieties, the hybrid tea 'Smooth Lady,' is completely thornless. The old classic cultivars 'Veilchenblau' and 'Zephirine Drouhin' are also thornless, and many of the wild species spawn the occasional thornless individual. But some would argue that there is an abstruse philosophical connection between roses and their thorns... and there are always gloves and stem-strippers.
This is really great information. Thank you!
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